Developed for Week Sauce Jam (April 2023), The theme was
My Contribution: Writing Character Dialogue for the "Interrupter" enemy type and Itch.io website copy.
"Interrupter" Co-worker Chatter:
"Goooooood Morning! It really is just the most beautiful weather we’re having today, isn’t it? I’m such a huge fan of days like today. Not to hot, not too cold, or too breezy, or windy at all really. It’s like you could take an umbrella outside and not have to worry at all about it getting flipped inside out or carried away. BUT HOW SILLY! You don’t need an umbrella on a beautiful day like today that’s neither too hot nor too cold at all in fact I think it’s just the right type of weather for taking a game of checkers to the park and waiting on a bench for someone to come play with me. I can wait all day sometimes if I like. It doesn’t bother me at all to wait. I can stay there all day just checkin’ my checkers…. Get it? I made a joke about checkers there just now. I do a lot of joke making while I’m waiting for new friends to come along and play checkers. Sometimes the jokes I tell are so funny that they make me laugh and it scares the pigeons away sometimes, but I don’t mind at all because the pigeons scare away the people who might want to sit down with me and play checkers. It’s such a nice day for it, too! I love when the weather is like this and it’s not hot at all, not so hot that you would need to wear shorts or sandals which I don’t like to do at all because I have very hairy feet. My mom once said that If I wasn’t bigfoot’s child she wouldn’t be sure where she put my head on if she didn’t screw it on so tight. But that’s why I don’t really wear sandals, well, that and I haven’t found a truly business appropriate sandal that doesn’t stand out awkwardly in today’s workaday world of brown and black business shoes. See sandals can’t be polished, right? So they don’t look very professional, especially when you have to put Band-Aids on your toes from when you cut them shaving. Anyway, I think it is really important to have professional shoes in today’s modern way of working and if you aren’t wearing the right shoes someone might think you’re just a lay about with nothing better to do so instead of sandals I wear these really shiny-cap toed shoes and I wake up extra early every day before work to polish them and then I get to work early so that the shoe shine guy in the hall can give them an extra good once over so that I look fit to start the day like a well-prepared worker. Sometimes though the shoeshine guy wants to talk forever and I’m like ‘c’mon, guy! Can’t you hurry it along?” but I would never say that because he's such a lovely man and did you know that he is only two years away from retirement? He has been in this building for more than seventeen years. Isn’t that something? He has stories about almost every person that works here and he could go on and on for hours and I’m just standing there like “hey guy this is great but some of us have places we need to be, amirite?” but I let him go on sometimes because it’s just polite and it’s not like there is much you wouldn’t want to take time for on such a gorgeous day like today! I swear on my commute over I saw a cloud that looked like it was being spilt in half by another cloud, and then it had all these little clouds all around it, like a cloud resting lazily on a pile of fluffy clouds. It looked SO COMFORTABLE! I would have laid there looking at it all day but then someone told me I needed to get up because I was on the sidewalk and what was I doing looking at clouds, but I say what’s the point of even waking up if you’re not going to take the time and appreciate the beauty in the little things, amirite? So anyway, like I was saying there was an episode of my favorite show last Thursday, the one with the tall guy who always comes in and saves the day at the end, and then he met the girl with the hair? I love to watch her in like, anything she’s in. I remember she was in that one film a few years ago with the other two women from that show they were on. Do you know which one I am talking about? It was out for two seasons, and then it got cancelled before the third? Well, anyway, she’s in it too, and it is just the funniest, scariest thing I’ve seen in ages. I feel like I could watch anything this guy is in but this show is really special because it speaks to me on a deeper level. Spiritually, I mean. When I’m watching it I feel connected with the greater infinite expanses of space and I feel the utter meaninglessness of the black void of time and it just makes me feel at home, I guess but also like I’m not at home, like I’m staying at a bed and breakfast or someone’s AirBnB and they turned off the lights and I don’t know where the light switch is but it’s okay because there was a turn down service I wasn’t expecting and so the bed is already ready for me to climb into but I also don’t know if I’m going to make it there without stubbing my toe, you know? The show is kinda like that. It gives me the “I’m at home but I’m also not at home feeling” that we watch TV for in the first place, you know what I’m saying? Of course you do. You seem like one of those, “Deep thinker with lots of time on my hands to ponder the infinite possible realities of the universe while watching primetime television” sort of people, so I figure you’ve got to get it. So anyway this show was on the other night and right around the middle of the second act of the episode structure I had to get up and use the bathroom so I paused the TiVo and when I came back to continue watching the screen was paused on a frame that had a cloud that looked SO MUCH like the one I saw this morning! It was uncanny! I feel like I was experiencing déjà vu of some sort and on such a lovely day like today it’s hard to believe I was feeling any sort of déjà vu. Ha! Silly me, I wasn’t experiencing déjà vu, I was just recalling something that I had seen earlier that really resonated with me on like, a truly deep level. You know?"
itch.io website Copy:
"The Boss is out of office and needs your help, Intern!
There's plenty of tasks that need to be done each day to keep the business running. Your Team (and your performance review) are counting on you!
Unfortunately, your colleagues have decided that working nine-to-five ain’t no way to make a living and are eager to pawn their tasks off to you. Time-wasting chatterboxes and wandering work-shirkers lurk around every cubicle corner, happy to share the joys of unpaid overtime with the lowest rung of the corporate ladder in this satirical single-player stealth adventure.
Help our overworked and overtired Intern complete their own responsibilities before the end of each day to earn a stellar evaluation… or fail and watch your career vanish like donuts in the break room!"
"The Boss is out of office and needs your help, Intern!
There's plenty of tasks that need to be done each day to keep the business running. Your Team (and your performance review) are counting on you!
Unfortunately, your colleagues have decided that working nine-to-five ain’t no way to make a living and are eager to pawn their tasks off to you. Time-wasting chatterboxes and wandering work-shirkers lurk around every cubicle corner, happy to share the joys of unpaid overtime with the lowest rung of the corporate ladder in this satirical single-player stealth adventure.
Help our overworked and overtired Intern complete their own responsibilities before the end of each day to earn a stellar evaluation… or fail and watch your career vanish like donuts in the break room!"